Wishingdreaming,
Your friends know you, they interact with you on a daily basis, and have had the opportunity to observe what you are living each day with your ABF. Sounds to me as if they have your best interest at heart. As stated, only you can decide if you want to continue in this relationship.
Personally, I believe you are in a very unhealthy situation. As the alcoholism progresses, the situation only gets worse. You are experiencing the "tip of the iceberg" You truly cannot save him. Love cannot fix this disease.
He is not boyfriend, husband, or father material, at this time. He is an addict.
There are thousands of attractive men out there who have their act together. I think you are selling yourself short in accepting his unacceptable, and out of control behavior.
What is he doing about his recovery?????? Spending the weekend with friends getting hammered does not sound like someone who is trying to come to terms with his addiction. Doesn't sound ready to me. Actions speak louder than words.
Sometimes we have to feel the sadness, we have to mourn the loss of the dream. Accepting the loss is part of the process.
Time to focus on YOU. Reconnect with friends and family, Take control of your own life. He is not relationship material at this time.
Sending warm thoughts your way.