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Old 11-05-2011, 05:44 AM
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GingerM
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Join Date: Apr 2006
Location: Under the Rainbow
Posts: 1,086
dbh: sometimes procrastination is procrastination. Sometimes it's your psyche's way of saying you need a break and simply can't do anymore.

My MIL is one of the most wonderful women I've ever met. She lives in the woods and her house is always dirty. I learned from her that a dirty house is not the end of the world. Neither is a messy desk. Neither is an unkempt yard. Her house isn't unhygenic - no one's going to get sick from a little dirt.

I use this as an analogy. I'm not sure what it is you're procrastinating, but I've grew up where everything was of equal importance. A clean bathroom was just as important as filing taxes. I am just now learning how to balance priorities.

With my dad in jail currently, and my mom needing all the help I can give her, and my job sucking up 60 - 80 hours/week, I don't have much extra time - not even to procrastinate. But I've also started dropping things that I used to think were "critical". House doesn't get vacuumed? Oh well, no one's going to get sick from it. But the dishes get done because someone will. I have a pile of filing on my desk that's on the verge of an avalanche. Guess what? It will still be there waiting for me next week. But the bills get paid religiously. I haven't dusted in months. But the garbage gets taken out.

Perhaps you're being overwhelmed not because you're procrastinating, but because you're placing equal weight on all tasks on your to-do list. Or perhaps your placing equal weight on all things is overwhelming and therefore you procrastinate because you don't even know where to begin. I'm not entirely certain about the mechanics of the why's.

I know for me, I sat down and started prioritizing. Anything that will make me sick or get me in legal trouble? That MUST get done. Dishes, bills, garbage. That's it. Three tasks per week. Anything that will result in poor health for my critters who are unable to take care of themselves? That's a priority. Critters get fed and cared for daily. One more task. Since I'm taking care of my mom's household, paying her bills is a priority. Since I get paid to manage things, running my department is a priority.

The rest? The dust, the dirt on the floor, the filing, heck, even laundry can go a lot longer without being washed than I used to think it could. The bathroom doesn't get cleaned weekly anymore - it gets cleaned when it's dirty enough to make me not want to use it. Kind of icky, but hey, if it's clean enough to use, and it's hygienic enough to use, why clean it? One more thing off the list. The yard? Choked with weeds right now. Mother Nature can deal with that. I'll worry about it later.

I suppose I procrastinate my procrastination. And don't undervalue the importance of just sitting and "being." I frequently show up to appointments 15 minutes early so I can sit in my car and not have anyone bothering me. I take that time to just be. It helps me get back on track and sort out the 'necessaries' from the 'would be nice, but's.

It also helps to be loving to yourself. The more you beat yourself up for procrastinating, the more likely you are to procrastinate. Accept that you will procrastinate, and the likelihood is that you'll stop feeling so much of a failure and start getting more things done. Not ALL the things, but more things.

This is a humour piece, but it kind of sums up the spiral of being harsh on yourself: Hyperbole and a Half: This is Why I'll Never be an Adult (sorry mods, I can never remember the rules on links - if you don't like it, I can give directions on how to find it) But it's true. We don't get an award for being an adult. No one has ever commented on my house not being pristine, and I'm guessing most folks don't notice. Those that do notice have the decency to not say anything.

I find that a few hours of being left alone and not doing anything can be wonderful for my ability to get things done. I get burned out on "doing things", then can't find the energy. it's not so much procrastination as exhaustion.
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