Lindauk,
I am sorry you are having a down time. I remember a few times that I would be in my car driving to get some wine and turned around too. I was always so glad the next day that I turned around.
I have 84 days sober, and I am beginning to see that it is going to take more than not drinking to keep me from drinking. (Does that make sense?) In other words, not drinking will help me more than anything I could possibly do, but it is not the magic formula that erases all problems and moods - although my drinking was so out of control that there was actually no chance for happiness (or life, actually) if I continued. So I have begun to finally accept that there will be good days, ok days, bad days. I think that is what they call "normal". (Heck, it has been so long since I have been normal that I forgot what it was like. Wow.) Take care - it will get better. Just keep on doing the next right thing (I love that phrase) and don't drink.
