Originally Posted by
ljames103 
I just posted yesterday about being 1 month sober (still sober, don't worry). But the thing that's been nagging at me is that I'm also currently being treated for depression and anxiety (caused by drinking, or did those things cause the drinking in the first place? Who knows?).
Anyway, I'm on a daily dose of Lexapro (which is helping tremendously) and I also take Xanax on an occasional basis for panic attacks. I take them as prescribed.
But here's the thing: If I'm taking substances to help me feel better, am I really "sober" or "clean"? Some people would say no. I don't want to feel like I'm using any kind of crutch. I don't know.
Any thoughts on the subject?
hmmm...i guess i don't know what to say. if you're like me, then xanax is a benzo is a trigger is a direct route back to my DOC, so it's total abstinence for me.
There are alternatives to benzodiazapines though. Vistiral for instance.
Here's a pamphlet on recovery approved medications, and medications that might be a problem for recovery, and those that should be avoided at ALL costs if you value your sobriety.
http://www.talbottcampus.com/pdf/MedGuide.pdf
But i do echo one post that your meds are between you and your doctor. HOWEVER, we in recovery MUST be strong advocates for ourselves. Doctors who do not have training in addiction sometimes have to be put in their place when they attempt to prescribe certain medications.
a brief story: I know a guy that was addicted to heroin. He got clean for 90 days and was happy, healthy and abstinent. He was involved in a car accident. In the hospital he screamed "no opiates!!!" keep in mind he said this about ten times. Well a new nurse came on and didn't talk to the rest of the staff, saw a standing order for morphine, and administered it. He said "was that ******* morphine?" (he of course knew it was).
Well he fell off. Granted he chose to cop, but the morphine woke the beast, and his hard won recovery was gone.
So please, be an advocate for yourself.
bren