Headed to a Meeting
Just taking out loud here...
It's been some time since I've been to an alanon meeting.
The first one I ever went to was years ago. I was trying to get info on how to save my mom. At that time she was in full alcoholic swing. Months later she was close to death.
I hated that meeting. They gave me no quick-fixes and did not seem to understand that if I didn't do something my mom would end up on the street. Even though I knew better, I felt I was the only one who could save her.
Since then she's gotten sober and has been so for 8 years. It amazes me it's been that long. It doesn't feel like it to me. I can remember how I felt like it was yesterday, although I'm not angry any more.
So, over the years I've been to a few Alanon meetings but never found one to stick with. I'm also an AA member myself, 3 years sober. I've been focusing on that for a long time.
So I think it's time to go back. For many reasons. Both parents are sober alcoholics. My fiance is a sober alcoholic. I think it could also help me with sponsoring other alcoholics.
My fiance has been sober for almost 2 years. Recently his meeting attendance had tapered off. For lots of reasons I suppose. He's a full-time student with long days, 12 hours M-Th. He recently got a new sponsor and was really working hard. Since then he got angry at the sponsor and hasn't called him back and hasn't gone to a meeting in weeks.
We talk a lot: he's open and honest with me and I tell him how I feel about it. I've never told him he HAS to go. I don't think that's a smart move. I know it didn't work for me in past relationships. Recently he's been going through this thinking that he may not me an alcoholic. I can relate although since getting sober this time, it's not even a thought in my mind any more.
Yeah, it worries me, but it's not my deal. I just tell him he's the only one who knows if he is or not. (I've never dealt with him drinking) IF he decides he's not and he's going to drink, I'll cross that bridge when we come to it. Thank God, I'm not obsessing over it. Years ago, I would have been for sure.
So, I'm just trying hard not to "work" his program or get all bent out of shape.
So anyway, I'm planning to hit a meeting tonight. The first one I looked up, ironically is called "Happy Hour". Sheeeesh.....