Begin by focussing on yourself and your children. Just a minute at a time. If you are hungry, eat. Just put one foot in front of the other and do what you can in this moment. Is there a safe place you and the children could go temporarily? If there is violence going on you must leave. There are community shelters if you have no family. I know it is hard, but for now, forget about your husband and his illness and take care of yourself and your children. You can call 311. There is hope. You are loved and the situation is overwhelming if you look at the whole thing past, present and future. So stay in the moment...right now...do something towards protecting yourself and your children. Make that call. Blessings and prayers are being sent to you.