The house is on the market (as of Saturday!). AH worked all day Saturday and Sunday fixing/finishing his landscaping projects. I got all the interior paint touched up, scrubbed, etc. Pictures turned out great... It really is a beautiful house
. We have a brokers open house tomorrow and a regular open house on Sunday. I'm saying my prayers for a quick sale.
The divorce stuff is moving forward. Financial paperwork is being assembled.
CPS is doing their investigation... Which may help me get sole custody... May not. My lawyer advised me that I may not have a choice and may end up with joint custody... But that I should stay on my toes with documenting stuff, calling cops any time I'm concerned, etc.
I'm working hard on my recovery. Talk to my sponsor daily. Two meetings a week, plus a weekly visit to my therapist. I'm getting stronger... Starting to see just how much my own mind get hurt me, and if I focus it properly... How much my mind can heal me!! The pain AND the healing are all right within me!!
The kids are doing okay. We drove around the school district today... Looking at houses that are for sale in our price range. They want something near one of the parks or the school playground!! It was fun to see them embrace change as a good thing!!!
My sponsor and I came up with a great idea tonight! We were discussing a recent interaction with AH. She said, "oh girl! You done good!! Reward yourself for a job well done!". We talked about ideas on how to track our "wins"... Journaling came to mind first... And then she mentioned, "these moments are like beads strung on a necklace. Each pretty jewel representing a job well done!". And that's when it hit us! I'm going to start stringing real beads... Maybe make a necklace, maybe a keychain... I don't know. But make something that is a symbol to me of my growth! Something that I can carry with me everyday, that isn't as obvious as a notebook, or al-anon literature! I love it! I love the idea of hunting down unique, intricate beads - that represent how the new me handles life!!
So anyways, I'm taking it one day a time... Thats all I can do right now.
Thanks for listening!
Shannon