Thanks Kittyboo. You are right, I do need to at least express to him how I am feeling.
I know why he deliberately avoids mentioning me. It's because they won't like it, and he doesn't want them to be upset with him. He doesn't want to rock that boat.
I just need to figure out a very non-judgemental way to do it. And I think the truth is I have some judgement about his dishonesty. It's not how I would handle any relationship in my life. But I hope I have come far enough in my own recovery to stay out of it.
So, I guess, what I am asking is...How to stay out of it, when it does affect how I feel about us?