Fight or Run?
Hi SR friends,
I am interested in input here as I face a decision on how to handle this divorce.
I met with an attorney. I have claims I can make financially, based on the money I paid into things like HIS house and HIS credit card. I can claim 1/2 his retirement over 2 years, as well.
We have one joint credit card that I have made the payments on all along. It has a relatively small balance (in comparison to the rest of the country!) that was originally mine from a higher APR card. I paid off his card balance first, and then began working on this one right at the time that I moved out. I also paid about $20,000 into his mortgage while living there - so about $23,000 total on his personal debt. He has refused to pay anything toward mine. I offered him a divorce settlement to take 1/2 this card balance and I will assume the rest and the account in my own name. Now he wants to whittle the amount down - taking all the while about "fairness".
I can:
1. assume the entire debt and run, run, run away as fast as I can from this psycho and never ever fight with him again,
2. Fight for something...anything...back on my financial investment in him and his debt.
I am torn.
He's pulled a real doozy this time...breaking into my email accounts...making up lies about "things I did to him"...telling my how I feel. (I really hate that!)..refusing to take any personal responsibility for anything (big surprise) and just being a general a$$hat. Blame, blame, blame....yeesh it never ends!
But it can end, if I want to take a loss. Walk away with less than I had when I began this crazy-train relationship.
Thoughts? Should I call the financial loss a 'painful lesson learned' or should I pursue what I rightfully, by law, have a claim to...some return on my financial investment in him?
P.S. I can afford the financial hit - it will hurt, I am a single Mom with teenagers - but I can do it and be ok.