Confusion is a very big part of it I think. This eased for me once I made that all or nothing decision. I remember during one of my attempts to give up, I was going to AA but not following the programme as I am now, I gave in to the craving for a drink - I had a pint with friends. Nothing bad happened although it did turn into more than one pint but I didnt get drunk. I did however feel very confused by it all. I didnt think I should go back to day 1 as I hadnt got drunk. I wanted my cake and eat it perhaps. More likely I just hadnt got to proper full acceptance yet. I believe you really need this to succeed and you need to want it and then you need to work at it IMO.