Peony1

It's the morning of day 3 for me after drinking heavily (and of late during the day as well - bottle of vodka then blackout) for about 10 years. This forum has been a godsend both in terms of information and basic human kindness and support. I have seen that I have had (hopefully) a serious problem which I've ignored for years and years, blaming others for my own weakness and impacting on their lives in such a negative way.

Only three days so far but I am feeling so much more positive in general without that 'ugh' feeling when I wake up and the 'what did I do last night?' that rampages on through the day as guilt and self-loathing only to be relieved by drinking again and so it goes on.

I am actually finding that I enjoy the sober me more than the drunkard.

I have a bit of a challenge tomorrow as I'm off to the US with the other half for a business trip but instead of thinking of how I'll get a drink while he's in meetings (last time I spent an hour wandering the streets trying to find somewhere to buy a bottle of vodka in a strange city) this time I'm planning out places to visit and I just hope that I can hold on to the last 3 days.

Thanks again to everyone again.