Welcome to SR.....I'm sorry that you haven't received feedback on your previous posts. We all do our best here to welcome newcomers. We understand the loneliness and anxiety that comes with loving an addict.
I remember when I was first considering leaving my xah. Your story sounds so similar. Just trying to get my xah to counseling was a feat. Then he went once with me. The counselor called him out on his behavior. And he never went back. He told me I was the one with the problem. He deflected. He threatened suicide. His words were mean and spiteful and I felt like crap. It was pretty miserable.
When the pain of living with him was greater than the thought of leaving him, I knew what I had to do.
I'm so sorry that you're going through this. Please keep posting. Venting. Reading. Learning. And share your journey with us. We will walk with you. You are not alone.
gentle hugs
ke