familydestroyed, my exah is an alcoholic and from what you wrote it sounds like yours is into drugs of some kind. You said you would stand behind him if he gets help well it sounds like he hasn't done that as of yet but seems to be intimidating you into lets have things back where they were. Stand firm not just for your sake but your kids as well. Do you go to Al- Anon, or do you still go to therapy even if he doesn't go with you?