Originally Posted by
BecomingMe 
I've been wondering about talking to him after hearing from his mom that he has been to regular meetings, has a counselor and is on meds (possibly just antabuse, possibly antidepressants too). I feel an obligation to tell him that I think we are beyond reconciliation (I think he still believes there is a chance for us). Maybe I am letting myself be reeled in by his mom's words (she felt the need to mention to me that he is "trying to be strong but he really misses his son."
I added a few emphasis points on your post. These things stood out to me.
You are verbalizing an intent to break "no contact" based on a conversation with his mom. HIS mom. Sorry, but he is her baby boy and she wants what is best for her son and grandson. She may be uncomfortable with divorce, with alcoholism, with consequences and she may be trying to manipulate you into believing what she believes.
You know what it was like living with alcoholism.
You know what it is like without it in your home or in your daily conversations.
You do what is best for you and your son for today.
You are a good mom and you do make good decisions for yourself and son.