good afternoon everyone. is it really possible #2? well, i guess it really is. my ah has not seen his 2 kids in six months. has not made any attempt to meet w/ my lawyer to come up w/ some kind of agreement about arranging visitation for himself. he is already behind on child support and it only started in June. he is sending same texts like he did 6 months ago and basically has not moved one inch in his denial (if he did move it surely must have been into greater denial).
so much for my update about him. as far as me, i am slowly (very slowly) digesting the fact that it is really possible. the man that i thought i was married to is nowhere in sight. what happened to the person who was ALWAYS paying all his bills ahead of time? what happened to the caring and loving person, who actually used to put others ahead of himself? i don't know. either that person is gone or all of it was just a big cover up to disguise his real self and his real intentions.
either way, it doesn't really matter. in a way, i am a little bit relieved that his true colors are showing and i can see (however slowly) that i did the right thing by leaving w/ kids. slowly, i realize that the things w/ his addiction are not only as bad as i thought, but seem to be much worse than i even anticipated.
other than that, the new baby girl is coming in about 6 weeks. i'm nowhere near ready, but it is ok. little babies have a way of getting things worked out for themselves. i wasn't ready for the first two either, but i figured it out. at least this time, i don't have additional stress of addiction hanging over my head. a little sad b/c this is going to be the first baby w/out my husband in the picture, but that's ok, too.
sorry this post is so long. look forward to hearing from everyone. i have been reading other posts, but hadn't really updated you guys myself.
hugs and prayers to everyone. thank you in advance for responding.
