Jayjay, last week I attended a counseling session with my AH (we are separated and he is still drinking). I am not normally an anxious person at all. I felt super anxious about the session. On the drive to the counselor's, I felt so anxious I started thinking I was probably not safe to be driving. I think I was having a minor panic attack. At the counseling session, my vision kept getting dark and I thought I would throw up. Anxiety!
This week I went to counseling alone. I told the counselor about the intense anxiety I felt the week prior, and the anxiety I was feeling in general. I told him that I had to listen to my body because it was trying to tell me something. Of course I attribute anxiety to all the stress and confusion of the last months. He said that anxiety like that is usually a response to anticipating something that is going to happen. He asked me what I might have been anticipating happening in that session with my AH that caused me such intense anxiety in the car. I thought about it a lot, and the answer was that I was anxious because going to counseling with my in-denial AH that day meant REALLY facing the truth about our marriage, which is not likely to survive all this. Even now when I type those words, I feel light headed.
So that was a helpful piece of advice --- WHAT are you anxious about? Specific things. My counselor asked me to make a list to bring next week.