Please know this is said with love, healthy compassion and experience from what I have learned. . .
"If you are so powerful, as so to control over him, so much to him that YOU CAUSED him to drink and be an alcoholic - then why don't you just STOP HIM from drinking?"
Now, doesn't that sound a little off basis?
That's what a sponsor told me - I truly mean it just to help you see - we are NOT that powerful -
an alcoholic will drink no matter what -
if you can search for it - find the thread about "excuses alcoholics used to drink" it was very eye opening for me -
There is nothing wrong with holding on to your hope that he will start a program of recovery and things will get better for your relationship - for me, I just wouldn't want to put my life on hold any longer - I want to live today and embrace all that is before me.
YOU get to decide what you want to do. . .
Therapy, Alanon, posting here & your relationship with your HP should give you the guidance as to what is healthiest for you!
PINK HUGS,
Rita