Great response about Nar-anon/Al-anon Kindeyes.
Cag - Programs like Nar-anon and Al-anon are there so that we can help OURSELVES cope with our loved ones addictions and behaviors as well as care for OURSELVES before we care for anyone else. If you go to Nar-anon or Al-anon meetings hoping that it will help you fix your boyfriend, then you will be very disappointed. Do this for YOURSELF. Those meetings are a safe places where you can share what you are really feeling and hear others' stories and experiences with dealing with others' addictions.
I have learned a lot from attending Al-anon meetings - I've learned that my bf's addiction has absolutely nothing to do with his love for me. He is NOT doing this TO ME, he's doing it to himself. And there is nothing that I can do or say that will change him. I learned to let it go and to focus on myself and my own feelings, and I also learned how to deal with my feeling so that I don't react in self-destructive ways. That's what Al-anon has given me.
I hope you understand a bit better now. And if you have any other questions or just want to talk, you can send me a private message.
Sending hugs and strength your way,