Thumper

This needs to be quoted twice. So important!

There are two other things I'd like to express.

People change. We choose how we live our life daily. Who is the man today? That is the man you are married to. Make decisions for yourself based on who he is right now, not on what was true about him in the past, or what the future might hold, or who he could be.

i was stuck because I wanted to plan so far out. I wanted to know what he was going to do and I wanted a crystal ball to predict the consequences of all my actions for the next 3 years - or more! I was repeatedly told to just do the next right thing and let go of my need to predict my future (and his). That was hard to do. I was used to planning every decision I made in an effort to manipulate and predict outcomes several steps down the line. I did that in an effort to feel safe but it wasn't working. I was stuck. Once I made that mental switch and just started doing the next right thing I was able to start putting one foot in front of the other and move forward. Tomorrow I could do the next right thing based on what I knew then, etc. etc. I could even make mistakes and change my mind because I was moving forward and making decisions that were best for today one step at a time....not trying to manipulate and make decisions based on some far away outcome and a bunch of what ifs. Did that make sense?