FoundmySelf

I married my high school sweet heart 3 weeks after we graduated
we lived a pretty normal life for young kids. He went to University
I went to school and became a hair dresser.

We spent every evening together with friends and family
loving and living life. I was the envy of all my girlfriends
they were all dating, playing the field and I was madly in love and married
to my high school sweet heart. I had everything I could ask for.

3 years in to our marriage I got pregnant with our baby girl.
We were OVER THE MOON. Dan, my husband, would rub my tummy
talk to our baby, read to her and tell her every day how much we loved her and wanted her.
I had the most amazing pregnancy, and enjoyed every minute of it. On October 18th of 1996 born on her due date our daughter Jordan Michelle was
born in to this world. Perfect from head to toe.
I was so blessed, my world seemed so perfect.
My daughter was my everything. My husband adored us I had it all

On December 2nd of that year my whole world was turned upside down.
I was home sick in bed and so my husband took our daughter
I needed Gingerale and Nyquil.
They never came home
Dan was hit by a drunk driver 3 blocks from our house
He was on his was back home to me
I lost both my husband and my daughter that day
I also lost my own life...

I started drinking the night we buried my little family and here i am 15 years later on day 7 of sobriety.
I have re-married and had more children, but it is not the same
I love my kids but I can not allow myself to get close to them
I am terrified of losing them
that is why I am 7 days sober, so my now husband won't take them

I miss my first husband daily, and my sweet sweet baby girl,
i long for the day we will be together again.

That said I love my family here on earth as well...or I would not be working to keep them