I'm not an alcoholic but am the wife of an AH and I have bipolar2. I've never seen the chicken and the egg thing applied to bipolar re alcoholism. I see it all the time re depression though. Alcoholism and withdrawal do cause depression but was the depression there to begin with? Bipolar usually hits during late teens - early twenties. I self-medicated - I had severe anxiety and to feel normal I'd drink a bottle of wine with company or have a drink before I had to go anywere. I likely drank when I was hypomanic too because of the impulseviness and to calm myself. People will drink during depression to take away the pain or use other drugs. I needed the alcohol and planned things around it but once I dealt with the anxiety the thought of alcohol never crossed my mind. I might have a glass of wine if it's there but I never buy it and I'll have glass and I'm done - one more and I'm under the table. Bipolar hits when you're young but that doesn't mean you're diagnosed young. I was diagnosed in my 30's.
You likely all know about the biology and genetics of alcoholism but I think there's environmental and psychological factors. I had a problem with drinking while I was sick and it went away with meds so am/was I an alcoholic? It's complicated.
I've never heard of alcohol causing bipolar but I do think that bipolar can cause alcoholism. I believe there's something in the brain likely the pleasure centres that predisposes a drinker to become an A. The self-medicating would lead to alcoholism if you're predisposed.
I belong to an online support group for mood disorder and there's an addiction board there so MI and addiction often do go hand in hand. This board is here for that reason and I wish the families would come on here. There has got to be MI family who deal with acoholic family members. Addicts post here and there are likely lots who read. Because of the stigma people will rarely discuss MI or A unless there's a separate board. The fact that there are separate boards tells me that it happens. It's complicated - IMO self-medication is common and if you're predisposed to alcoholism that self-medication likely will take you down to alcoholism. IMO bipolar and addiction are separate.
Your wife was recently diagnosed. It takes awhile to get the right meds and then get the dosages right before she'll feel better. If your wife can go through withdrawal and deal with bipolar at the same time - even medicated - the withrawal will be alot harder for her. I honestly don't know how people do it. Insanity x 100. I'm medicated and doing well, I quit smoking for 3 weeks and realized that the withdrawal became hypomania. It took me 3 weeks to realize - I felt like I did off of the meds - started smoking again. It's been weeks since I went back to smoking and the last 3 days have been normal - it drove me over the edge. Not everyone is the same, people on here have done it. I have so much respect for them.
I'm sure I've completely confused you. Educate yourself about bp, it's hard on families and there's support but not much. The focus is on the patient which frustrates the families. Having to live with someone who has bp is similar to living with an A. It's a roller coaster ride. I'd say the coping skills are similar.