basias - My emotions were all over the place for the first few weeks. I had a struggle with regret and remorse for months. I finally realized that if I allowed those feelings to take over I'd be stuck on square one. Be kind to yourself as you heal - eventually the positive thoughts will take over as you evolve into the person you want to be.
I had tons of wreckage from my drinking years, so I do understand how you feel. When you talk about it here, it helps relieve the stress and anxiety. I'm glad you're sharing this problem with us. We promise, it gets better and easier.