stilllearning

Being able to recognise that codependency "feeling and thinking," for me is a giant step. That's the first thing that saves my bacon, actually - I get that "oh, no - here I am again," feeling - then I remember that it has -always- passed, eventually.

I can still get the crazies - two things have changed my life in recovery. First, it's up to me to stick up for me (this looks like a simple sentence but has been a life-changing revelation). I have the right to do it, I'm responsible for it and I now have the tools to do it. I cannot change anyone else but I can take or leave situations that aren't good for me or practice detachment (try to) when I'm in a situation that's triggering me.

The second thing is that so very little in the world around me has to be taken personally. The difference between something feeling personal and being personal is huge. If I can pause before I react - that pause is where I can stop the crazies blowing out into a full-scale meltdown.

Thirdly - first things first (old and hackneyed but a goodie for me). Self care means getting some rest, eating well and if I'm in a bind, pulling out all my recovery books and keeping my nose in them until something helps. I got really burnt out at work recently and the difference that taking a real weekend that wasn't stuffed with chores made to my frame of mind was amazing. I have no center when I'm not making time to rest and clear my head. It really shows.

All of this may be too vague, I hope something is of value - no huge insights but really, the fact that you recognise that you're "there" and are reaching out? That's amazing.

Hope it passes soon, SL xoxox