Thanks everyone for the words of encouragement. Today marks one week clean. It's funny....life goes by soooo fast and normally a week is nothing, but it seems as if this last week has been monumental for me. I am still attending daily NA meetings, and counseling starts next week. I find the NA daily journal to be very helpful and even though I am still feeling crappy, writing in it helps. I swear-what I wouldn't do for a time machine!!
I have gone through withdrawals many times, so I know it will get better. Yet, every time after, I have relapsed. And instead of just saying..."well you used this once, get over it, and keep moving", I instead use the "well screw it, you already messed up, so why not enjoy it?" attitude. I really need to stay on track. Any advice for the future?