Congrats on 4 days clean!
You say in your initial post that you don't want to join AA. I am curious to know whether or not you have ever attended any AA meetings? I think that online forums are great, but going to meetings, getting to know people face-to-face, & finding a sponsor is going to keep you accountable more than anything. Don't get me wrong, this forum is great, but being behind a computer screen isn't the best way to be accountable in my opinion. I am only counting days so am no expert on sobriety & am sort of typing this for myself as well since I have been ill & not able to go to many meetings for a couple weeks.