I know about that feeling it's edgy but tired anxious feeling. Dont' really feel like moving around and doing anything right? But about to scream. That's what drove my bp right out the door this week. I thought I would hear a definite yes on Monday but had to wade thru to Tuesday to hear that things were blocked up because the one guy that has the power is gone till next week. Everytime the phone rang I jumped about 2 feet. The only cure is to physically stay busy or doing something that eats up your mind, getting involved in a movie or something. I finally got so worn out with it I just gave it up and getting a tooth pulled helped me take my mind off all that I had something new to worry about. This oral surgeon was making me want to scream, he was working fast against the caine meds that wear off fast because I can't take normal caines with epi it causes my heart problems to flare so he's working like a maniac and tools are hitting my chest, stuff is dropping on the floor, his 2 assistants can't work fast enough and he's humming some ditty and saying stuff like oops.... geez louise I was at one point praying to travel outside my body just to get out of that "hot" chair. So I forgot all about jobs, money, lol...
Some guy in my nurse support said you think when we're lying on our deathbed we will care about some job? And all I heard was the word lying... and thought he meant we as addicts will be lying to the grave about things haha but he meant prone as in plank as in doing the death rattles lol how my mind goes and what I heard amazing. And no I don't think I'll be worrying about a job when my time comes but part of what I do is my work on Earth. but I agreed with him. I am more than a job. I am a unique walking DNA specimen okay then did not mean to soap box you. I love you. Take care.