Originally Posted by
wywriter 
(((hugs))) to you for making this decision now, before it has a chance to cause a lot more hurt. I know I hate what my kids are exposed to when AH drinks, and I'm only now starting to be able to set boundaries when he's being verbally abusive. The driving thoughts I try to keep in my mind whenever he gets like that is, "Is this what I want my son to think is an acceptable way to treat his wife?" and, "Do I want my daughter to settle for this?" The strength has been in realizing that dysfunction is multi-generational, and I really want to break the cycle for my kids.
This is exactly why I divorced my husband, he was verbally abusive and so incredibly disrespectful, among dozens of other unacceptable things.
My boyfriend is different, he is kind and loving and thoughtful. He's been wonderful with my kids. But still... once I opened my eyes to the fact that he's more than a "social drinker" I can't close them again. I've been going to al-anon weekly and sticking to my program and keeping the focus on myself. But I am still sad... and working on "accepting" that this is the reality instead of blindly going forward and getting myself into another mess. So, that's progress.
