Welcome, nm, glad you are here! I too, lurked for a few months (whilst 'trying' to quit). It wasn't until I actually registered on here and began to post that it clicked for me. I wasn't alone anymore, I could vent at any time, and have support 24/7 if I needed it. 82 days later, I'm feeling I am living a new life. It's wonderful.
I do understand how you felt that you were literally going to die from drinking. I also felt that, too. I woke every day thinking about how my body was crying out to heal, and I ignored it. Daily. It wasn't until I nearly died one night from choking on my vomit whilst asleep that I realized I HAD to do something. Right then and there I quit, and I have not touched a drop since, and I never will. Enough was enough.
Keep strong and keep posting! Wishing you all the best.