Hi Chicory,
Sorry that you had that experience.
The board that I used to participate in had a strong no crosstalk policy and I would spend a considerable amount of time worrying that I was doing something wrong.
Intellectually I understand the policy. They want to create an environment were I can feel safe to share without getting feedback from others. They are also put in place so that I'm not tempted to people please and save other.
I participated in that group for three years and I never truly got the hang of it. I agree that hearing something in person (a gentle "no crosstalk") is different from getting an impersonal message.
I don't think a "hug" is interpreted as a potential predator. I think it's discouraged so that the person who is sharing doesn't fall into victim mode and so that the person offering the hugs is able to turn their focus away from other ACAs and back to themselves.
Hope it doesn't discourage you from attending other meetings.
Warm Regards,
db