JoCino:
First let me start by saying big hugs to you. My Ex-boyfriend of more than five years was/ is addicted to cocaine and I found out this March. I don't know how long he as been on it etc. because I choose to leave him when I found out when he was in the hospital. He has done some sort of detoxification program, and he has been trying to reach me via anyway of communication that he can. We had a large age difference between us as well, he is 16 years my senior. While you are concerned for your wife and her recovery don't take this on as a problem for you to solve. Addicts are very good at lying and hiding it. You don't want to put yourself in a situation where she can continue to make you feel like you already do.
I would suggest working to get sole custody of your daughter. She deserves the very best and right now, your wife does not seem to be that. I would also suggest that you allow your wife to hit her rockbottom. Easier said than done I know. Trust me this is one of the hardest things I have ever done. I hurt, and the pain can be overwhelming at times. The only thing that keeps me going is my faith, and knowing that I deserve better. You deserve better as well. You deserve a mate that will not have an addiction to put before you. Your daughter deserves her mother, free from substances. She deserves a family where she can trust both parents.
You will get a lot of love and support from the people on here. Take it easy!!