Welcome griswold. We are glad that you have found us!
At three months into my marriage I knew that I had made a big mistake. I also should have known better but thought things would get better once he had a stable environment to live in. That was WRONG. My stable environment became crazy due to his alcoholism. I held on for over six years until I was a complete wreck. Now I have been divorced for a year and a half and I am so thankful that I finally got out. It was very hard to divorce someone that I loved but it was the best thing that I have ever done for myself.
AlAnon has helped me a lot. Please find a meeting in your area.