welcome to SR ! First off try not to trouble your self about problems you dont have yet . I was always good for that projecting into the future in a very negative manner .Nine months ago my disease took me into round the clock drinking and drugging , and yes it was a horror . I came to the realization that I could not drink like " normal " people and went to a detox facility which started me on my way , I did outpatient treatment and use AA as my recovery program today . " It works , it really does "I suggest you pick up the phone and call a detox or the number for AA in your phone book, you can let go of your misery today if you choose , life without booze can be great . You can do this ! Prayers Trish