I'm glad he is okay, and i', especially glad that you had nothing to do with it.
We all lose it once in a while. We all take it back, turn it over, take it back, turn it over... i challenge anyone here to say they haven't struggled like that in the past. Some things are just harder to turn over than others.
This is my new thing now, every time I see the word fear i want to share what a friend told me it stands for:
False
Expectations
Appearing
Real
Anticipating what the future will hold is exhausting, and I have found that 90% of the time I am wrong. Most of the time, because I thrived on stress and malfunction, I would anticipate the worst possible outcome, and blame and prepare myself for it. Similar to what you were doing I think, picturing him lying next to a dumpster with no shoes, all dirty and bleeding from getting beaten up. Our imagination can get pretty vivid when we lose control like that. Anticipating the worst, so the blame we put on ourselves is horrendous. It's weird how codies do that, I know I do. I make it as hard on myself as possible. Worst case scenarios, and somehow they are always my fault.
And in actuality, he ended up in a better place than you could have offered him, even if you went to rescue him. Better for you, and better for him. What a relief.
HP works in mysterious ways. Perhaps your suffering and worry was a lesson, an opportunity for you to learn just how powerless you are over what he chooses to do. Many times, I hear, when we ask our HP to remove a shortcoming of ours, He presents a few opportunities for us to experience those shortcomings full force, to illustrate how right we are to remove them. What a lesson, in so many ways.