Yeah, it's tough because she may always blame you for all of her problems, not everyone finds recovery and stops doing that. My STBXAH currently blames me for everything bad going on in his life, he even invented the idea of me having an affair as the reason I want a divorce, which is totally untrue. I keep having this fantasy that someday he will realize this divorce is because of his alcoholism and apologize to me sincerely but every time I talk to him, it becomes more apparent that the realization may never come and I just have to not expect it anymore and move on.