Originally Posted by
BadCompany 
... I had the difficult task of becoming willing when I really wasn't willing at all.
This sounds like a paradox to me "becoming willing when I really wasn't willing". It reminds me of "He wants to want to stop." from page 109.
I myself experienced Cognitive dissonance when doing the steps. IMO this is where steps 6 & 8 come into play. I have preconceived notions about what I will and will not do and even when I "know better" than to let them interfere with my moving forward they do anyway.
I have to pray for both willingness and courage to go beyond those barriers that inhibit change. The concepts that helped me most were the famous paradox's;
We must suffer to get well
We must surrender to win
We must give it away to keep it
We must die (egotistically) to be reborn.
About the only thing that breaks my ego down is counter intuitive action and contrarian thinking. AKA sacrifice and humility.