Many of my A family members (cousins, Aunt) do not live near me, so I do not have to live with their drama by default.....the "easy way out" so to speak.
The qualifier that brought me to the boards is my A stepson. I have no direct experience with an A significant other. It seems to me when talking with my husband, he does treat his AS differently than he treated his late AW. He did not understand about boundaries then, and she basically manipulated the heck out of him, as he tells it. Mr. HG and I both went to Al-Anon together and learned what we could do to protect our sanity and property from his AS, so there are strong boundaries in place with him.
That's about all I've got......sorry it couldn't be more useful!
Hugs, HG