While the timing for this sort of this is never right, I'm glad your husband discussed this with you now, when you are feeling stronger. If he would have unloaded all these feelings in your very early sobriety, you might have been of the "f**k it" mentality and not pursued serious sobriety to begin with. At least that's what I probably would have done, sadly enough.
After a couple of AA meetings my husband was about to unload on me and I told him not to. I said, I'm not ready and that's what Alanon is for. I can't hear about all the crap I've said and done right now. I don't know when I will be ready and I don't feel it will ever be my job to "help" him work through it. I am not a therapist and lord knows I had a hard enough time with my own junk.
All I'm saying is, if he hasn't gotten any support outside of you that can be very stressful. I think if he is really resentful he has to find his own support. You can't fix anything, all you can do is not drink and work on your own stuff. If someone where to tell me tomorrow that it's up to me to fix my husband I'd run for the hills! LOL I wouldn't know what the heck to do!
Thank goodness when i told my husband to stop he did. I don't know if I'd be sober right now if he would have unloaded on me.
