Originally Posted by
sandrawg 
Whenever your AH starts quacking, keep telling yourself that. Write it on a sticky note and put it all over your house if you need to, to remind you that talk of "marriage counseling" is just that. TALK. How about some talk about getting sober??
This is very very good. And a complete sentence. Because this will be the basis for any marriage counseling if the counselor knows he/she is dealing with an addict. That is first and foremost the biggest issue. Without sobriety - counseling is pointless and a waste of time and money. As long as he is using, you will be second in his life. His kids will be third. No amount of counseling will change the fact that his first love is using.
Your processing through this in a very healthy way... keep up the good work!