Thanks for your post. It helped me too. I get what you're going through.
They call what bf does to you (and what mine does/did) 'ambivalence'.
F#ck that!
I'm finding that recovery doesn't automatically make them see the value of really good things in their life. You are of value and he sadly is too mucked up to see that right now. Or he sees it but feels he doesn't deserve it.. or who the heck knows. Waah waaah waah for them.
It isn't your problem or mine to figure out. And like I always say, good luck finding someone out there with half the patience to reside in Crazytown with someone in recovery.
I have no advice to give. Only that I feel your pain, annoyance, frustration.
His loss for not valuing the love you have for him.