I don't do AA, but from I'm told, it goes way beyond just sitting around talking for an hour. Those 12 steps have transformed a lot of lives in some really lasting, meaningful ways.
If AA isn't your bag—and how do you know that until you give it a try?—then you could also consider SMART recovery or an addiction counselor. The point is that what you've been doing until now isn't working. At all. You need to try new things. If nothing changes, nothing changes, and you will have a lot more mornings like this... and much worse. Going to a AA or SMART meeting and/or talking to a specialist could yield all kinds of other things to incorporate into your plan.
Nothing's going to magically solve this overnight. Hope alone sure won't do it. But taking a step now, followed by another and another, will help you reclaim your life. You really can do it.
Glad you're back here!
