There's something going on with me about him though, I think it's taht I project my anger towards AH onto him--he runs around for days doing god knows what, I worry my heart sick that somethings happened to him, then he shows up to eat, sleep and take off again.

I guess I"m powerless over my cat!

I'm not looking for advice, or ill placed blame so be respectful please. I"m trying to process wtf is going on with ME about this. I feel like it's a total waste of my time to continue to do this, madness really. I need sleep, I need sanity in my life, I don't want to chase that ******** all over the neighborhood and I dont' want him to go live somewhere else. I just want him to shut the **** up and stay here and do what I tell him to do.