Originally Posted by
Kassie2 
I had to admit to myself that my EAH was only looking out for himself and not both of us. A marriage is about two people! That is not working on reconciliation.
I delayed things and took financial hits and emotional hits and losses while he tried to recover - but his recovery did not include learning to care about me. So I had to take care of me. He used to tell me that he loved how tenaciously I could love someone - so I decided i needed to love myself the same way.
Oh, Kassie, I hear you and it helps me not feel so alone. Every day my head tells me this same message and every day I expect it to be different but it's just getting worse. I fight it less and less. I am starting to realize I need to accept this.
I am going to do a separate post now to get out some of the crazy thinking I have been going through.
Take care and lots of hugs and yes, love yourself and savor any moment that even begins to feel like your own self has come back.