happyplace

Does that make sense to anyone? I abuse alcohol. And I do various other things to constantly cripple myself. I even feel pretty comfortable and "normal" when I have a cold and am lying around in bed. The irony is that I am a man in my 30s who is generally healthy. Does anyone have this "not-wanting-to-be-healthy" problem? What is that all about? I'm not sure, but some theories:
-Introversion. Being unhealthy gives one an excuse to not participate in the world and be alone.
-Anxiety. Being healthy means you have energy, which can be hard to handle.
-Excuse. Maybe it's just an excuse to indulge in addictions.

I think being fundamentally introverted has something to do with it. Just wondering if anyone has thoughts to share.
Thanks.