HI Mareah, WELCOME.
You are so lucky to have discovered your addiction at this age. YOU can really turn this around. You seem really bright and you write really well. It doesn't surprise me that you write poetry. Feel free to share some if you like.
Don't wait to be like me, 38 and struggling to re-do the last 10 years of drinking. IT has really taken a toll on my face and body. Sometimes when I wake up, I feel like I look 20 years older than I feel. But at your age...you can stop all tht ugliness...if you want to.
I get from your message that you WANT to, but that it is hard. I hope you have some resources, like a sponsor or a doctor or a therapist who can listen to you and offer advice.
PS good for you for working out!