I don't believe talking with the doctor is codie at all. I believe it is out of love for your father and seeing his debilitated condition.
If you can remember, ask the Dr about some of the newer Alzheimer medications that are out now. They don't 'cure' it, but they do 'push it way back' and give the sufferer a more 'normal' life that they do 'remember' for a lot longer.
Again, I am sure the Dr will tell you what needs to be done to get his license removed if there is no hope with medication.
It will probably mean more 'work' for you (just when things were settling down) to take them on errands or do their errands, but anything to keep your mom and dad safe.
No you are not a codie.
J M H O
Love and hugs,