Originally Posted by Sylvie66

An update, of sorts...
I went to the AlAnon meeting, and talked to my ABF. I told him that I would no longer live with him as an active alcoholic. He stopped drinking. We've had one conversation about how he feels about it since then. It's been kind of nice, seeing what we're like without alcohol being an issue...

Today his brother took him and ds out for a burger. Someone at the restaurant pressured him to have a drink, so he did. Then he lied to me about it (saying he'd had a sip and given the rest to his brother), and told ds he was a tattletale. QUACK!

I've been so okay with not waiting for the other shoe to drop, okay with loving him in the here and now. But in what reality is it okay for an alcoholic to have a drink while caring for a kid?? I may have been okay if ds wasn't there, but that's not what happened!He said he would quit drinking. In what reality is having a drink a part of NOT DRINKING?

He has not sought help yet; apparently he can quit on his own... QUACK!!

I HATE the idea of leaving, of starting over, of being broke, and lonely, and the tangle of "I love you; I just won't live with you". Well, you have two other choices: 1) learn to accept him as he is or 2) stay miserable. So you've got 3 choices! You just gotta pick one.

Tomorrow's fun conversation: Get help, I'm moving out May 1. Not OR. AND.... Get help AND I'm moving out May 1.
Too drastic? or too little, too late? How about, "I love you but I have concluded that I don't choose to live like this. I hope the very best for you and honor the choice you've made. I'll be moving out May 1."

I know it's the right thing to do. I just feel awful. Thanks for listening, again. I have tonight to figure out my words.

- Sylvie