Welcome
It really doesn't matter if you drink more or less than people around you. It also doesn't matter what other people think about your drinking, or how 'they' might label you. Thank goodness! What does matter is that you're not drinking like a 'normal' drinker. Drinking has caused problems in your life, which means it's a problem for you.
Why not stop for 30 days and see how you feel? That might answer some questions you have about whether or not you're an alcoholic.
In my opinion, there is no 'acceptable amount' of drinking that is congruent with recovery. I either drink, or I don't drink.. Luckily I choose the latter, every day.. so far for a little over two years. I have no interest in wedging my foot in the doors of my drinking hell again, it's not worth it to me.
If you're not an alcoholic, you should have no problem following the 'acceptable' (using your terminology) drinking guidelines established by the DGA:
According to the Dietary Guidelines for Americans,1 drinking in moderation is defined as having no more than 1 drink per day for women and no more than 2 drinks per day for men. This definition is referring to the amount consumed on any single day and is not intended as an average over several days. Source: CDC