Unfortunately, this is often how things turn out when we issue an ultimatum. The other person complies, in order to appease us. But, we are still not satisfied because things didn't go as we had hoped.
Imagine you are him reading this letter from you. Sounds like "Even though you did what I demanded you do, I still want you to do more. You're still not good enough for me and I want you to change."
Looking back, I am glad I didn't demand AA or rehab from my AH. He probably would have done it, to appease me. And it would have prolonged the suffering for both of us.
L