I'd suggest you hit the 'friends and family of addicts' or 'friends and family of alcoholics' sections here. That's where I came from, as I was the spouse of an alcoholic. Do some reading and I'm sure you'll see lots of familiar stuff. I'd thought my situation was unique until I came here.
I came to this section because I'm having a hard time navigating my partner's alcoholic and emotionally abusive parents. I value my relationship with him very much, but I want to stay away from his parents as much as possible without offending him. This has turned out to be very difficult.