I think the danger in trying to "help" an alcoholic is inability to let go of the outcome. Because, honestly, it could go either way. It's very easy to get stuck feeling resentful when all your "help" doesn't help. That's why it's important to ask yourself if you love her exactly as she is. What if this is the best it ever gets? Is that good enough for you? Do you honestly love her, or do you love the person you believe she could be?
L